Godzilla Vs. Kong (2021): A Review

1 Apr

-For the Uncensored!

Out of all the movies that have pleased me the most in all my time watching cinema, King Kong and Godzilla are two titans of cinema. Every Godzilla fan shunts the Matthew Broderick movie into outer space where it belongs, so GTFO with that bullshit. And yes in fact I loved Peter Jackson’s iteration of King Kong, because it was a loving ode to the original story by Demille and proved that the Kong could still be in fact, the King. Kong: Skull Island (2017) didn’t impress me that much, but most of the newer iterations passed Peter Jackson have never lived up to the momentum of Peter Jackson’s version in 2005. Plus, it was the only time Kong fought three T-Rex’s. It’s still an amazing scene and Naomi Watts still delivers a great performance in it.

            What I would say is that I am pretty luke-warm on the recent iterations, and Godzilla King of the Monsters (2019), produced by Legendary studios, was okay, fun but not so bad. What Godzilla Vs. Kong does well is manage to juggle all the human characters from the recent films, but also put enough titan clashing to make Harry Houser cream his pants.

            After this, there will be spoilers ahead, so if you haven’t seen the film, please, go watch it now, or if not, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

            In Legendry’s produced Kong Vs. Godzilla (2021) transported to Skull Island, by APEX, rivals of Monarch, to investigate a Hollow Earth dimension, inside the center of the earth (this is where I thought of Doug McClure), where it houses most of the creatures, and can fight against Godzilla. Who is being a major dick right now. Seriously, he attacks Kong in the ocean. What gives Zilla? Not smoking enough to calm your ass down?

            But something is wrong at Apex, the rival company to Monarch, from the previous films, which is housing secret technology. And Kong knows sign language now, which is a plus, but also plays into Michael Crichton’s Congo (1980), a little.

            The interesting part of this film is that Emma Russel, who returns from Godzilla, King of the Monsters, gets involved with a conspiracy theory whistleblower who helps her find out what’s going on at Sublevel 33. The conspiracy theorist laments about his dead wife and talks about “when this flask is empty you know I’m done.” Josh, the plucky best friend, tags along, and pretty much does nothing the entire time. Honestly, this might actually prove that Alex Jones was right about everything. I guess all the water and nuclear energy turned Godzilla gay.

Because inside here, we find it. “Skull Crawlers.” Emma and the conspiracy theorist guy get trapped inside the pod, and they are taken to Hong Kong, through a tram tunnel system.

            When Kong is in Antarctica, he wakes up disoriented, covered in snow, and sighs. Playing with the snow. He’s instantly calmed by Jia, a young girl who can communicate with Kong. He’s asked to go through in the hole where they are about to travel through with the Heav station to find the weapon that might help them defeat Godzilla. They are pushed a thousand miles in two seconds, into another world, Hollow Earth. (it literally makes me think of films like the Earth’s Core in 1976 and Land that Time Forgot in 1974, both starring Doug McClure). 

            After a battle with another snake bat creature, ripping off its head and eating it, he makes his way to a chasm, and then with gravity turning him light, lets him fly. The orchestra reminds me of Vangelis at this moment, and it’s pretty astounding. 

            The humans in the Hollow Earth follow Kong, where he picks up an ancient axe, and roars, and like the humans to spoil the moment, they say, “he’s home” and I’m like “no shit, thanks for that exposition. Now let me enjoy this moment.” At least Peter Jackson let me enjoy the moments Kong had without exposition to make me acknowledge how I felt. I think the exposition could have been dialed back.

            Emma then find there way to a “sacrifice pit” as they are now faced with Mecha Godzilla. Her father, making an appearance from the second film, now knows that his daughter is in Hong Kong, as Godzilla goes to fight off MechaGodzilla, knowing that there is trouble in the animal kingdom. 

As I had thought, Kong was onto the enemy. But they find out Gidorah’s brain, a Titan brain, is being kept alive. So, it wasn’t just MechaGodzilla either, it’s creating the neural link up to Mechagodzilla through a living supercomputer. Somehow I wish Doug McClure was somewhere in this film.

Kong’s axe glows, and it draws radiation from the core, but Apex then uses a little drone to take a sample of the radiation for APEX. But APEX has no idea if the energy source will break the MechaGodzilla prototype or not.

As this is happening, Godzilla is shooting his nuclear ray into the ground in Hong Kong, and shoots a way through to Hollow Earth. So this begs a question, “Did Godzilla drill a hole straight into China?”

Once you see this scene, you will think that. It’s what I heard about my Asian neighbors as a joke “They are digging a hole straight into China.”

So, Kong jumps through with the axe, putting the axe against the cave, riding it down like a goddamn APEX predator he is.

The fight between Godzilla and Kong in Hong Kong (not meant to rhyme) leads to buildings being destroyed by both Kong and Godzilla, and Kong’s axe blocks Godzilla’s radiation beam. In the first fight on the sea, Godzilla was king, but on land, Kong is King. So the two are both shows there disadvantages.

Through a twist, Godzilla dominates Kong again, but Godzilla sees a worthy adversary and walks away again. As the leader of APEX tries to start his MechaGodzilla, it breaks away from the pilot, and then starts to gain sentience.

When MechaGodzilla and Godzilla fight one another, MechaGodzilla has an advantage, firing missiles at Godzilla. The situation with Kong is that he’s still barely alive, but they need to restart his heart. They use the Heav ship as a compressor, and the little girl, Jia, signs to Kong that Godzilla is not the enemy. Kong even knocks his shoulder back into place like an 80’s action hero, and begins his fight anew.

As Emma and Russel, and the Emma’s friend, Josh (who has mostly been comic relief and the plucky best friend) are about to die in Hong Kong, trying to disrupt Mecha Godzilla’s satellite connection, the friend takes the conspiracy theorist drink and pours it over the machine. It turns out to work. Godzilla blasts a radiation shot into the Axe, and Kong fishes him off proper. Cutting off his arms, slicing his neck, and ripping off his head for a final touch. 

With MechaGodzilla defeated, Emma is reunited with her father, and the conspiracy theorist meet her dad, and invites him onto her podcast. Josh has his final moment when Emma embraces her dad, and he said, “It was Emma’s idea.” It kind of was a funny moment, as her father said, “Shut up Josh.” At the end, it looks like Godzilla is trying to fight again. Only the two have an understanding, looking at each other like 80’s action stars, with Kong letting go of the axe, and Godzilla disappears off into the ocean. 

Man, if this was in a theater, I think I would have still loved this just the same, but with Mecha Godzilla spoiling it for everyone, it kind of kept me unsurprised. But it’s still a pretty great film for 2021. But I think it manages to embrace a cheesiness that works for the film, without being overtly cheesy as the film seems to be aware of the inspirations it draws from, and much of the film relies on the audience’s ability to suspend disbelief, and have fun. And fun it is. But some of the exposition to help make me feel things didn’t work for me, and I already knew how I felt about certain scenes. But it is kind of an era for the Legendary films monster epics. Now, all we have to do is make Call of Cthulu now.

Final Analysis: 4/5

-Louis Bruno is the author of more than 15 books, including, The Michael Project, The Michael Project: Book 2: The Lost Children of Eve, Thy Kingdom Come, The Disintegrating Bloodline, Apocalypse Soldier, Hierarchy of Dwindling Sheep. His books can be found on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Lulu. He can be found on Gab, https://gab.com/thereallouistbruno, Minds https://www.minds.com/lbruno8063/, and Parlerhttps://parler.com/profile/therealLouistbruno/posts. Instagram @lbrruno8063 and @louisbrunoofficialbook. He has written for the Intellectual Conservative and Ephemere. Also, he writes on https://louisbruno.substack.com, where you can support him directly. His latest, Come Home, Young One, a dark fantasy novel is out now at Lulu.com. Link is here: https://www.lulu.com/en/us/shop/louis-bruno/come-home-young-one/hardcover/product-pw8q7z.html?page=1&pageSize=4.  His next series, City of Sand, will be available sometime this year.

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